New statement from the Islamic Emirate of Afghanistan: "Afghanistan Causes Holbrooke’s Aorta Tear-Up"

NOTE: This is the third statement the Islamic Emirate of Afghanistan has released about Richard Holbrooke since his passing. You see the previous two here and here.
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Muharram 09, 1432 A.H, Thursday, December 16, 2010
In the Name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.
According to media reports, American Special Envoy for Afghanistan and Pakistan, Richard Holbrook, fell ill in the 7th storey of the American Department of State during a meeting about the mission and situation of Afghanistan. His heart suddenly stopped normal blood pumping and was taken to a hospital. Later sources said that there was great pressure on his heart, causing a tearing of aorta. Holbrook was a veteran high-ranking American official of the State Department and a key diplomat. He was the only diplomat who held two slots at the same time as senior advisor for two important regions of the world: Asia and Europe from 1977-1996.
A French news agency reports, Holbrook gained reputation as an American diplomat when, in 1995, the Dayton Accords were signed thanks to his good offices, ending the Bosnian war. However, all these talents, reputation and experiences notwithstanding, Holbrook failed to play any spectacular role in the solution of the current crisis in Afghanistan and Pakistan — a crisis which is handiwork of America– in the past two years in a way that could benefit America and add to his reputation.
Evidently, his plan and policy was jeopardizing for the regional people and countries and shameful and perilous for America. Holbrook’s goal was to persuade people of Afghanistan and Pakistan to take the American war to the point that people would believe it was a legitimate war of America; array people against each other in ethnic hostilities and keep people occupied and engaged in deceptive peace slogans. However, time and again, this policy has stumbled on frustration and is despicable as a demeanor.
The believing people of Afghanistan and Pakistan, undoubtedly, understand that Americans are aspiring to keep a long-term occupation of the region and want to tip people of these two countries against each other. Therefore, not only the people have put up resistance to the nefarious mission of Hoolbrook and forge ahead with their resistance but simultaneously, voice their aspiration that, may the Americans kneel down here on this soil and face historical rout.
It was because of this unanimous spirit of the Muslim people of Afghanistan and Pakistan to crush America, that it had become a cause of frustration and depression for Holbrook. All his schemes and plots had gone awry, bringing under question his reputation that he had won at Balkans.
At last, Holbrook succumbed to the psychological pressure, leading to a tearing of aorta, a principal artery. His heart stopped to function normally and he fainted at a meeting held at the State Department of America about the mission in Afghanistan and the region. Presumably, he followed in footsteps of a veteran American general, general Petraeus, who a few months ago, passed out during a senate hearing, slumping over the table.
In view of the untoward cases of General Petraeus’ fainting and Holbrook’s heart attack, we advise all American rulers, generals and diplomats who are engaged in the Afghan issue to abandon continuation of hostile and colonialist policy about Afghanistan and better to resign from your positions. Afghanistan is not a land and a country where you could attain implementation of your deceptive and devilish schemes; nor it is practicable that the indigenous people of the region would ever ignore the current occupation and existence of 150,000 troops on their soil. They are not going to be swayed either by the policy and bragging of General Petraeuous, Holbrook or other American war-mongering officials.
The American high-ups should ponder what is the benefit of a task which ultimately will lead to shame, depressions, heart attacks and, still more, to consequences being worst than that.
The Islamic Emirate of Afghanistan